By Susan Stiffelman, MFT
Anyone who’s a parent in this technology-driven, sensory-saturated world knows there are approximately a million and one potential distractions in our daily interactions with our children. Even without the pull of 24/7 work hours, texts and emails, as well as various other commitments and obligations, it’s not always easy to be there, even if we’re there. And chances are our kids have busted us for it.
In Parenting with Presence: Practices for Raising Conscious, Confident, Caring Kids, LA-based marriage and family therapist Susan Stiffelman offers guidance for well-meaning yet befuddled contemporary parents seeking genuine emotional connections with their progeny. Personally endorsed by renowned spiritual guru Eckhart Tolle, her book is a heart-centered how-to guide for a new generation of moms and dads attempting to raise gracious, empathetic, well-attached kids in our uber-fast-paced modern society.
This is as much a self-help book for becoming a self-actualized human as it is a parenting guidebook. “Our children are our best teachers,” the author often states. Her point is that the process of raising mindful children can be an amazing catalyst for our own personal growth.
Using real-life examples from her therapy sessions with both parents and kids, Stiffelman helps parents shine a light on the roots of their own reactionary outbursts, and suggests new ways to communicate so that everyone feels heard, respected and connected. She outlines mindfulness practices to use for specific problems, such as disconnects in communication and coping with stress, and for becoming overall more compassionate, intentional and present.
“The truth is, parenting is ridiculously difficult because it asks us to manifest qualities in ourselves that we may not yet have given birth to,” Stiffelman advises. “Simply do your best. Be kind. Make mistakes. Fall down. Get back up. Reach for courage.” (New World Library)
This article is a part of the April/May 2015 issue of Whole Life Times.