A Sense of Community among Spiritual Free-thinkers

By Kara Bachman

Free-thought parenting can often be a lonely affair. Where those affiliated with an organized religious faith often 3564907218_e21ca3bc65_mfind a strong sense of camaraderie from their involvement, those with free-thought leanings—i.e. atheists, agnostics, deists, humanists and members of other non-theist groups—sometimes find themselves feeling a bit isolated, and without a community to lean on.

Raising children is difficult under any circumstances. It is even more so, however, for the parent who is not connected with an organized church tradition. Many non-theist parents encounter questions such as:
• Does my child need to be exposed to other religious traditions? And if so, what is the best way to accomplish this?
• Is it appropriate to send my non-theist child to a religiously oriented private school?
• How do I teach my child to live among theists, and represent his/her viewpoint effectively? How should he/she deal with those who are intolerant?
• How do I gain a sense of belonging for my child in lieu of a church environment?
• How do I meet like-minded families, so my child can find understanding among peers?
• If not through religion, then how do I impart to my child a sense of spirituality?
• How do I find for my child non-theist role models in the larger culture?

Many non-believing, non-theist or Humanist families are unaware that resources exist. But rest assured, they do! There is a rapidly increasing interest in secular childrearing. Following is a list of helpful publications, groups and websites that can answer questions, generate ideas and help form community for families who identify themselves as being part of the growing freethought movement.

• A tremendous starting point is a collection of essays, Parenting Beyond Belief: On Raising Ethical, Caring Kids Without Religion, by Dale McGowan and Michael Shermer. Barely a stone is unturned in these essays, written by everyone from scientist Richard Dawkins to comedian Julia Sweeney, to magician and vocal freethinker Penn Jillette. This collection includes pieces with a wide range of views on parenting topics, and the essays range from the creative, to the philosophical, to the practical. There is also a useful companion forum.

• Think Atheist” has a radio show, as well as an interesting parenting section on their forum at ThinkAtheist.com.

• The American Humanist Association is developing a parenting section at their website: Here you can find reviews of children’s books for freethinking kids and read research data on religious vs. non-religious parenting.

• Although technically considered to be an organized religious faith, the Unitarian Universalist Church does not require theistic belief systems for participation. Many freethinking families who want to introduce their children to a church environment without compromising their principles find solace in the sense of community afforded by the UU church.

• Check your local Meetup groups. Meetup.com abounds in secular parenting groups, Humanist clubs, atheist and freethinker clubs, philosophy book clubs, and even, occasionally, playgroups for freethinking parents and their young children. You never know—a kindred spirit could be living right next door!

Hopefully, these resources can be used as a jumping off point in exploring what lies out there on the web and elsewhere. Even without an organized faith, there is no reason that the parenting journey needs to be a lonely one. And more important, there is no reason why freethinking children should ever have to go it alone.

Photo courtesy Valentina Powers

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1 Comment

  • Thanks for the article. I can see how it would be didicu
    lt without having the support fromthe community